


First Kiss

by Amaya_Ithilwen



Series: Collection of RVB-OneShots [14]
Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Canon-Typical Humor, Canon-typical jokes, Cyborgs, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-12
Updated: 2015-02-12
Packaged: 2018-03-12 01:58:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3339491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amaya_Ithilwen/pseuds/Amaya_Ithilwen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alaska is waking up from her unconsciousness. Slowly she has to get used to the fact that her left arm was out of metal now and she didn't fully remember what happened.</p>
            </blockquote>





	First Kiss

The first thing Ala was able to remember was a horrible pain in her left arm. Even in her state of dizziness, which was surely caused because of strong painkillers, she felt this horrible pain. With a whine, the black haired turned around, gripping with her right arm the left shoulder.  
But she didn’t feel flesh or even bones. There were... Bandages, what was pretty normal. And… Metal?!

With a gasp and a sudden jerking movement, Ala shot up in a sitting position. Or at least she tried it. In the moment she shot up, she was held back by strong hands, being pushed down on the bed. “Smooth…” It was a familiar voice, the one of Tucker. Again a whine was heard as she was lying down. Her whole body felt like been put through a meat grinder. Or worse.  
Where was she? And why was her left arm out of metal? It was supposed to be made of flesh! She was no cyborg or robot! She was made of flesh! But why was her arm then out of metal?  
“Hey, ya should drink something.” Again Tuckers voice. Opening her eyes, Alaska blinked the tears away to see the black face of Tucker. Worry was written in his eyes. His features looked like he hadn’t slept much. Beside a black eye and surely other bruises and black spots all over his body. But why did she know that? Had there been a fight or something?

A glass with water drew Alas attention back to the reality. Tucker had lift her head and held a glass with water to her lips. Carefully, but thirsty, the black haired began to drink some sips until she felt like exploding when drinking a sip more. “How are ya feeling?”  
“I’ve been better.” replied Ala with a raspy voice. She felt like she hadn’t talked for several days.  
“I think so. Ya have been off pretty bad.”  
“I feel like eaten and spat out again.”  
“I guess that’s the best description to your situation.” When there was something about Tucker what Ala liked, then it was his honesty. He always was honest towards her. Even though there were moments she absolutely did not need that. But most of the times, she was really glad about him being so honest.  
“Mh… I guess I’ll sleep a little bit.”  
“Yeah, good idea. Will surely help ya getting back on yar feet. Good night.”  
Before Ala fell asleep, she heard how Tucker covered her with the blanket and left the room.

The next time she awoke, she was alone. It was dark, and normally that fact would scare the living shit out of her, but this time not. It may be because of the remaining pain killers in her circulation or the hurting arm. It still hurt badly and she still didn’t know what happened. But her left arm was now made of metal. And she didn’t remember why. The last thing she remembered was arriving at sidewinder, somehow managing it to not get killed by the plane crash. After that, nothing. Only darkness.  
A shy knocking at the door announced a visitor. She didn’t ask him in. They would come in any way to check on her. And she wouldn’t have the force to say something, so she just waited for the visitor to come in.  
As suspected, the door opened and Simmons came carefully in. “Oh, you’re awake? Sorry to disturb you. I- I just wanted, uhm, to check on your arm.” As if Simmons got aware of talking to a woman, his voice suddenly got squeaky and high pitched. However, Alaska didn’t care about that. With his help, she slowly sat up on the bed and let him check on her arm. He made some adjustments while stuttering some explanations about the arm and stuff. She didn’t really listen to him. She was thinking about the happenings she didn’t got. Why the fuck was her arm suddenly out of metal?!  
But asking Simmons would be idiotic. He wasn’t able to talk normally to girls, so she would have to ask someone else. Like Tucker or so.

Just before Simmons left, she made him stop in holding his arm. “Would you mind asking Tucker to drop by when he’s still awake?”  
The maroon armored soldier only nodded shortly before he almost fled out of the room. And indeed, some minutes later, a fully armored Tucker appeared. He was carrying his helmet under one of his arms. Obviously he was just done with his shift.  
“Hey, how are ya?”  
“Been better.” Replied Ala drily. She really still felt like being put through the meat grinder, but at the moment there were other questions she had to get answered.  
“Ya don’t look that pale anymore.”  
“Quit the trials to comfort me. I feel bad. Don’t try to talk it away.”  
Tucker looked at her worried, but shut up as she asked him to. Only after some moments, he again spoke up. “Why did ya ask me to come by? I guess not because to sleep here.” Ala shot him a murderous glare, even though she felt like living shit. “Uh okay, death glare, I get it, stop talking.” Tucker at least was smart enough to get the hints she was giving him and immediately shut his trap.

“I asked you to come by and tell me what happened. Because I don’t remember it. Fuck it! I don’t even know why my left arm now is made of metal!” Her voice still was raspy and she had problems to talk. But as it came to her arm, she lift her sound arm, gestured wildly, her voice almost failing her. She didn’t know what happened to her arm, what happened to her in general. She didn’t know if perhaps someone died during her blackout. And she generally hated it to have holes in her memory.  
Tucker sat down on the bed and put the helmet down to his feet. He exhaled loudly as he rubbed with his hands over his face. Ala observed him. In the dim light of the bedside light she could see that he looked even more tired. Like he wouldn’t have much sleep. Like he always was on the run.

“Ya really don’t remember?”  
“I wouldn’t ask you to come by in the middle of the fucking night if I would.”  
“Okay, see ya point. Uhm… What is the last thing ya remember?”  
“Almost getting crushed by the smashing personality of Grif while the ship crashed.”  
“That’s… Not much…”  
“Already noticed that too. What happened after that?”  
“Well we fought the Meta, sort of. He more was beating us black and blue whilst Wash and ya tried to take him down.”  
“Mountain of a man in a power suit…”  
“Yeah, something like that. Well, some when during the fight he managed it to grasp yar left wrist. And twisted yar arm on yar back. Ya fell on yar knees, but he didn’t stop. He put a foot on your back and tore at your arm until it came loose.” Tucker swallowed drily. Ala could see that the memories were haunting him. Wouldn’t surprise Ala if he couldn’t sleep the last days since that because of the memories about that. “He tore yar arm out if it was nothing. Whilst you were screaming in pure agony. I never heard someone scream like that.”

Now Tucker shut up definitely, looking on his knees. Ala was sitting there, her eyes on Tuckers face. Even though his skin was black, she had the intention like he paled.   
Putting her thoughts aside, she lift her sound arm and laid her hand on Tuckers shoulder. “Thank you for telling me that. I can imagine that this is hard for you to again go through this stuff.”  
Tucker only looked at her out of the corner of his eyes, not saying a word. But his tired and haunted eyes, full of sympathy for her told the black haired enough.

“May I ask just one more question?”  
“Sure.” Tuckers voice was now raspy as hers. But she was sure, that it wasn’t because of the same reason. The teal soldier surely had to fight back the emotions. Seeing a comrade getting tortured that way was always shocking.   
“How long have I been out?”  
“For more than a week. Ya worried the living shit out of us.”  
“I… can imagine that. Sorry about that.”  
Tucker waved it off and soon stood up to go to bed. He really seemed tired and ready for some sleep.  
“Oh and Tucker.” The teal soldier again turned around and looked at Ala questioningly.  
“Thank you for telling me. I really appreciate that.”  
Again the sword wielder nodded before he closed the door and let Ala alone.

Now that the bedside light was on, she wasn’t afraid of the dark. Laying back down she again tried to remember. There, in the pitch black ocean of her memories, some islands appeared. Islands of memories. She saw how they all jumped out of the plane, attacking The Meta.  
On another island she saw how he threw Grif of the cliff, even though Simmons tried to rescue him.  
Again another island. Wash and she were attacking The Meta. But during the fight he managed it to get a hold on her and twist her arm on her back. Washington tried to free her out of his grip, but of no use. And suddenly she felt the overwhelming pain of her arm getting stretched beyond normal. Her joints were cracking and getting loose, sinews and ligaments were ripped apart and soon the tearing sound of flesh, skin and the fabric of her suit joined in.

And all that happened in less than half a minute, everything accompanied by the tortured screams of Alaska. Even though all of them tried to help her, they had no chance; they had to watch how the doll of a strong idea of an AI tore out her arm.

With a low whimper, the girl again pressed her sound arm against the metal arm. Those memories, even only some small episodes out of the whole happening, made her arm hurt. She knew this pain was only in her mind. So called phantom pain. But it didn’t made it less painful. Her whole arm was hurting. Now turning on her right side, she curled up to a ball. She remembered faintly that Simmons said something about the pain passing by the more she will get used to the metal arm.  
But she didn’t want that metal arm! She wanted her arm back! Her normal, flesh arm! The one that would bleed when you cut it! The one that would get black spots if you got hit! And not tin can attached to her body!

Silently, tears were falling off her eyes, moistening the pillow. She felt pain. The pain in her arm, which wasn’t there anymore. And the pain in her soul of her lost arm. It just hurt. It hurt just so much.

Again the door opened. This time a blond man came in. Ala didn’t know him. She already saw Caboose and Tucker out of armor. So she just figured out from the build and the way he was walking that it must be Washington. He seemed composed and calm, but she could tell from his eyes that he wasn’t. The dark shadows under his eyes were proving him to be a liar.  
Without asking or hesitation, he crossed the room and sat down on the bed of the black haired girl.

She knew Wash halfway. First they had only talked about strategically and military stuff. Well, she was the only real soldier around here, so she was also the only one who knew of what he was talking. After that, they soon began talking about private stuff, discussing about everything and everyone. But they never have seen each other out of armor. They both never took of their armor when being on duty. They would only take it out when going to bed.  
This here was the first time they saw each other out of armor and finally were able to connect the voice with a face.

Without beating around the bush, the freelancer looked at Ala, who somehow had managed it to turn around and sit up. She wasn’t able to use her left arm properly – If she ever would be. So it looked kinda awkward.  
“I’m sorry what happened to you.”  
Ala blinked. Wow, that was fucking straight on.  
“Well, it’s my own fault, so never mind.”  
“It isn’t your fault. I knew how dangerous The Meta is. I just stupidly believed that Maine would be still in there somehow.”  
“You were pretty close friends, hm?”

“Well yeah, but how do you know that?”  
“After the Mother of Invention crashed down, I found North and South hiding some miles away from the crash site. I was a wanderer too then. I had lost my battalion some days ago, was the only survivor of them, and didn’t know where to go. So when it rained, I went into a cave. North and South were hiding from the soldiers who looked for them. North was seriously injured, while South had a broken arm. I patched them together. And as time passed by, North, Theta, South and I got friends – More or less. And they told me a lot about the project and the people being part of it. Like you and Maine and CT were close friends.”

Wash only looked at her, not saying a word. It made Ala a bit insecure. Shouldn’t she have said that?  
“I’m sorry, I didn’t meant to tear open old wounds.”  
“It’s past and gone. The only thing that matters is the future. And as said, I’m taking full responsibility of what happened.”  
Ala sighed. She really wasn’t in the mood of talking about such stuff. The painkillers were making her brain dizzy and the pain clouded her mind too.

“Look, we could talk about that a little bit later, when I’m clearer in my head. At the moment I don’t feel like being in the right position to have so serious discussions.   
“I guess you’re right. You should sleep and get well soon.”  
“If I ever will be with this arm.” Ala looked at the limp and unmoving metal part of her body. She still felt like this thing wasn’t part of her body. But it would be from now own. Obviously they hadn’t been able to patch her sound arm back at her body. 

Wash didn’t say a word, only looking at the metal parts coming out under the sleeve of Alaskas shirt, before disappearing under the bed sheet.  
The black haired girl didn’t know Washington for long. But she knew that reaction. He was thinking. And taking all the blame on him.  
“Wash.”  
Nothing.  
“Wash.” This time a bit more insistently, but again nothing. The brows of the black haired furrowed.

“Wash!” slightly shaking him at his shoulder, she made him look up again. He still seemed to be halfway in thoughts, but that would be the best she would get at the moment.  
“Listen now. First: It was my decision to fight The Meta. So it’s my fault if I get injured. And Second: It was also our decision to help you. You may think you forced us, but that’s not true. You could never force us to do something we don’t want.” A small smile appeared on Alas lips as she watched Wash closely, who seemed to have some trouble to proceed her words.  
The Freelancer nodded, but didn’t say something, nor did he move. So again there settled quiet between them.

“You know.” Again Ala spoke up, what made Wash look at her. “I don’t know if it is relevant. But that with the arm was The Meta. Not Maine. Whilst I was caught in his grip, I felt like he was struggling with himself. Like someone wanted to stop him from pulling more at my arm and making it come lose. Like someone tried to save me. I’m sure that was Maine. As of Norths narratives he was way too docile to do something cruel like that.”  
A small smile appeared on Washs lips as he got up with a low groan.

Making her lay down, Alaska only looked at him confused. She didn’t quite get what was going on at the moment. But her question got answered as he covered her with the blanked and said.  
“You should sleep now. Rest and decent sleep is the best thing you could get at the moment.”  
“You don’t stay here?”  
“As much as I’d like to, but your arm still is very sensitive. I don’t want to cause you more pain than you already have.”  
“Oh, okay.” Replied Alaska a bit sheepishly. She really felt stupid for asking and not considering her hurt arm.  
“It’s okay. And thank you.” With these words, the blond leaned down and gave her a short kiss before disappearing out of the door with a short ‘Good night, Ala.’.

The next morning came slowly. It felt like an eternity. Alaska had been lying awake during most of the night, thinking about what happened. What happened during the fight and what happened as Wash shortly dropped into look after her.  
Her arm still hurt, but it had gotten better. It now was more a dull aching pain. Not like fire would burn her alive as she had woken up some hours ago.  
Slowly the rising sun lightened the room up and the black haired felt relieved. She was afraid of the dark. And the dull light of the bedside light hadn’t helped her this night. Perhaps she had lost her arm and was afraid to lose something more in the dark? Or that The Meta would linger there, waiting to tear her apart?

She didn’t know, but it made her shiver and pull up the blanket even more.

During the day, Doc came to check on the healing state and Simmons came by to make adjustments and train with her how to use her arm. There were only small things like lifting the arm and moving all joints. Opening and closing her hand, moving her finger. Just to get a basic understanding and feeling for her new body part.  
She had lied to herself long enough. She would never get her arm back. Her flesh arm. So she would have to accept and live with the tin can attached to her body.  
And as she had to accept this new part, she would also need to get used to it. To get to know it and how to use it in battle. To once again fight with the others against their enemies.

Luckily they hadn’t waited too long to replace her arm, what made her body remember most of the movements and which nerves had to be activated for that. It was only necessary to make… some adjustments, as the metal arm was a little bit heavier than the normal one.

So Ala was most of the time busy with getting to know her arm. At the end of the day, she was able to use it almost normally.  
And it had helped her to keep her mind busy and not thinking about her and Wash.

Yesterday, before he left, he had kissed her. Not an amicably peck on the cheek. It was a tender and gentle kiss on her lips. She still could remember the feeling as if he had kissed her some seconds ago.  
As her shoulder muscles hurt because she burdened them with the training, she laid both hands on her lap and began thinking about that particular happening.

As if she invoked it, it knocked at the door and Wash came in with a tray. There was a steaming dish on it and a bottle with unsweetened tea.  
“I brought you dinner.”  
“Thanks. Have you already had yours?”  
“I’ll take it later.”  
“Why don’t you eat with me?”  
There was a short silence between Ala and Wash, while he looked at her, still holding the tray in his hands. Obviously, he didn’t seem to know what he should answer.  
“It’s pretty lonely to always stay in here on my own. I really would appreciate it if you would eat with me. The others surely are already eating in the kitchen. So if you’re eating with me, you also won’t be alone, ne?” smiling the black haired looked at Wash who still seemed to have troubles proceeding this information.  
After some moments then, he gave Alaska the tray and put the tea on the bedside table. “Okay, give me some minutes.”

It didn’t take more than five minutes until the blond returned, bringing a tray with food with him. It was different food than Alas. She still had some kind of soup with very well cooked vegetables in it. To not overburden her stomach. Even though she would have loved to have some of Washs food, she didn’t ask. She knew that this would be too much and make her throw up.  
During dinner, they both talked with each other, joking and discussing about the guys and the watch out duty they were on. Everybody decided to stay here and give Ala time to heal before heading out to the next battle. And even though they tried not to urge Ala, she knew that she had to get well as soon as possible.

But that was her second worst problem at the moment. Her most important problem was Wash, who was sitting on the bed and eating dinner with her. He had kissed her yesterday. And Alaska didn’t suspect Wash to just deliberately kiss every woman he met. So she suspected that this was something special. But what? Should she ask him?

Observing Wash she came to the conclusion to better say nothing. He seemed troubled and tired. She would observe how everything would develop before say something. Washington obviously had other things in mind. More important things.

“You look troubled.”  
“Yeah, lot of stuff going on.” It was surprising, but towards her, Wash was really honest whilst he often lied to the others. Even though Alaska knew some things about Wash, she never told the others. She didn’t want to backstab him. He trusted her even after such a short time and she wanted to keep that up. To give him a place where he could be like he was without being paranoid that she could backstab or betray him.   
“You wanna tell me?”  
Wash rubbed over his face as he already was done with his dinner. “About your arm, about The Meta, about the Epsilon Unit. There’s just too much going on.”  
“You know, if you want you can always come to me.”  
“Yeah thanks.” A small but thankful smile appeared on his lips as he looked over to the black haired girl.

“Are you done with dinner?”  
“Yeah, I feel like having eaten enough for ten days.”  
The blond again smiled before he took both of the trays and left the room. Only to return some minutes later again with a steaming cup of coffee in his hands.

Ala raised an eyebrow, looking at him with a skeptical look. “You can’t sleep well with the coffee.”  
“I know.”  
“You aren’t really sleeping at the moment.”  
Wash didn’t reply as he took a sip of his coffee.  
“I see your shadows under your eyes. You don’t sleep well.”  
“May be.”

Now it was Alaska to exhale. That stubborn guy. Sure they both were Special Ops and both trained to not show any kind of weakness. But he was overdoing it sometimes.

“How about staying here for the night?”  
“You know what I said about that yesterday.”  
“Pish-Posh! My shoulder is fine and if I’m in pain I can still turn around. I also have a sound side, so I can also lay on this side. In addition it surely would help me to sleep better.” Remarked the black haired with a wink and an impish smile.

A bit confused the Freelancer looked at Ala, obviously not really knowing what to think about this situation.  
“Sleep better?”  
“Yeah…” Alas smile derailed and she scratched the back of her head with her sound hand. “You know, I’m afraid of the dark.”

There was a long pause between the two until Wash spoke up.  
“You’re kidding me.”  
“No really, I’m fucking afraid in the dark. Didn’t it seem odd to you that I always have light on during night when sleeping? That’s because of that. The last years I somehow was able to keep my fear in check. But since the happening with my arm, I am again afraid of the dark.” Her smile got awkwardly. Talking about her arm was her way to avoid the names The Meta or Maine or stuff. To avoid that unpleasant memory would come up again.

“So? Will you stay?”  
Again, Washington looked at her without saying a word. Then, after some moments, he got up. “Five minutes, okay?” And disappeared out of the door.  
Alaska was sitting there a bit baffled. What was she supposed to think of him? He always was so contradictory that she really didn’t know what she should think about him. 

Sitting there and taking some sips of the tea, she waited if Wash really would return. She didn’t know him for long, but she was sure that he would keep his promises. And indeed after some moments he returned; only wearing his civvies.  
“So you mind making space for me?”  
“Absolutely not.” Skidding over to the edge of the bed, so that Wash could lay between her and the wall, she waited for him to lie down. If she was lying like that on the bed, her metal arm would be on the opposite side of Wash and a bit protected if he was moving occasionally.

The black haired girl felt the moving of the mattress as the Freelancer lay down and waited for her to do the same.  
Taking her last sips from the bottle, she put the bottle on the bedside table and turned out the light.  
“Aren’t you afraid in the dark?”  
“I guess when you’re around then not. And it would only detain you from your sleep.”  
“Mh.” Wash only replied. Feeling for him, she then carefully lay down, putting her metal arm carefully on his belly. Snuggling close to Wash and putting her head on his chest, she could hear the strong and regular beating of his heart.

She could feel that Wash tensed up for a short moment, before he relaxed and let one of his arms sneak around her waist, pulling her close.  
In the dull moonlight she could see that the Freelancer had turned his head and looked at her. His grey eyes were shimmering like silver in the moonlight.  
Also lifting her head slightly to better see in his eyes, she felt how he moved. How his face got closer to hers. And this time, it wasn’t surprising for Ala what he was doing. So she straightened up a bit and met his lips halfway.

It was a gentle and tender kiss. Not urgent and all stressed. Just two pair of lips who met each other and carried many feelings in them. Even though Ala whether knew her nor Washs feelings really. That guy came into her life some days ago and turned it completely upside down. Since then she didn’t know what to think.

But this kiss, even though it was gentle and tender, felt so intense, so good. It wasn’t the first kiss per se. But the first time she kissed him back. Somehow Alaska had the intention that every kiss they shared would be like the first kiss. It was just too good to be an imagination or something ordinary.

Separating, Alaska laid her head back on Washs chest, closing her eyes with a happy smile.

“Good night, Wash.”  
“Good night, Ala.”


End file.
